I was on a coaching call with a client who in addition to recovering from a traumatic car accident needed to replace her car quickly. She was stressed and not able to decide between two possible car purchases. At first, when I listened it sounded like she thought they both had merits and was torn between two different, but equal choices. Further, into the conversation, it became clear that she did favor one car over the other. If she had a preference, why was she stuck with indecision?
Why was making a choice so hard?
As I listened, she described the advice that she had received from relatives that conflicted with her own instincts. It became clear that she was stuck because she feared various criticisms and judgments that would follow the purchase of the car that she favored. She knew exactly what each member of her family would say. She also had her own imagined criticisms she heard in her head. The expected negativity from others paralyzed her.
Finally, I posed the question, “What if you could trust that everything would be fine whichever choice you make?”
There was quiet. Then a much calmer and lighter voice responded. The Volvo. The question had released her from the arguments in her head and helped her to see what she wanted with more clarity.
How often do we all get stuck because we fear what’s ahead?
If you could look ahead with trust that it can and will work out okay, what would that change?
How might that change the way you show up? The way you approach the situation? How might that offer new possibilities and new solutions?
Sometimes just moving from fear to trust can change everything!
When we are afraid, we contract inside ourselves, we live small. Similar to how a deer freezes in the headlights, we stop moving.
When we allow ourselves to feel the positive emotions that might come from having what we want, or when we allow trust and faith, we open ourselves to more possibilities.
Who could you be right now if you trusted yourself? What could you bring to this situation if you knew it would be okay?